Just a stone’s throw east of Pigeon Forge is the resort town of Gatlinburg. Both Pigeon Forge and Gatlinburg have grown gangbusters since Franklyn Roosevelt designated the Great Smoky Mountains a park in 1940.  And both have attracted an astounding array of shops, attractions, and amusements to occupy every rainy day ’til the Rapture.

Speaking of rapture, The culture is a fascinating mix of overt Christian themes and symbols, and a reverence for all things Dukes of Hazzard.  In the midst of a grand log cabin facade on a row of shops is the message, Jesus Saves.  In Terry Evanswood’s Wonders of Magic at Wonderworks, he threatens jokingly at one point to lock the doors and preach for two hours.  (Read Jen’s and son 2’s review of the show here. )

Our kids delighted yesterday, returning from Gatlinburg’s very impressive Ripley’s Aquarium, in reading off the number of signs that advertised knives.  “Tobacco, beer, knives.” “Linens, moccasins, knives.” A dizzying array, including the selection for the discerning Christian: King James Knives. Open 24 hours. What do tourists do with all those knives?

For several wonderful hours yesterday we fished at Herbert Holt State Park outside of Gatlinburg, and our four-year-old made a steady stream of friends on the playground. Okay, we didn’t catch anything. But with the park rules limiting fishing to children only, nobody seemed to care much that fish weren’t biting.  It was a great spot for a picnic snack.

I expected the Ripley’s Aquarium to be, well, you know, two-headed sharks and blurred images of mermaids in grainy newsreels. Instead, I would have to say that while it lacked the grandeur of the National Aquarium,  the Japanese Crabs– about the size of a mastiff skeleton–were compelling, as was the exhibit devoted to slime in the natural world.

While two hours was probably enough, the collection is impressive, including a very cool feature that allowed the kids to control the speed and direction of videos explaining the animals on display.  Nothing like watching a killer shark dismember a dolphin in slo-mo, then regurgitate the whole mammal, over and over!